So I’ve made a commitment to bringing my personal story to my blog but I must admit I’m struggling with where to start.
In a discussion I was having with my Naturopath about this, I mentioned that I am actually way more of a private person than I thought I was. Yet sharing my personal growth is the right thing to do. I know in my heart that this is a good thing, for me and for my readers.
Humans are story tellers. Before the written word stories of our history, our families, our experiences were verbally told and passed down from person to person. People want to know how others do things, how they handle life, how they grow and change with all that life throws at us. I want to be a story teller! It is part of my most basic nature to want to help others, and what better way to do so than to share my personal experiences?
If you look at the kinds of things you read, watch (on tv etc) or see happening around you, don’t you learn the most from the things that happen to people you know and to yourself? Don’t you want to hear the true stories of others?
Going back to me finding this hard to do, it is not just about sharing some deep parts of me, it actually is more about not knowing where to start. You might say “Well Valerie, just start at the beginning!” Yet where is the beginning? I’ve been working on personal growth intensely for the last 2-3 years, since I moved to Vancouver, BC; but I have also done a lot of growth in the 4-5 years beforehand too. So where do I start? I am even contemplating working backwards, but I’m not sold on that. I’d like to be able to show all of you how one step has led to the next.
Let’s get started! I did post an “about me” as one of my first blogs that tells how I got to where I became an R.H.N. (Registered Holistic Nutritionist), so I’m going to start there again. I’ve had my issues with food and weight and emotional eating and have been seeking solutions all my adult life. I’m also a big believer in prevention and cure through natural and alternative methods. I struggled to overcome the belief that “modern medicine” was the only way to go. That’s what I was brought up with.
What has led me to so much desire for personal growth though is the belief deep deep inside me that I was and could be more, that I could be authentically me! That there was absolutely nothing wrong with me, and that I should be me. Why would I try to be anyone else?
Here’s where I really start getting personal. I grew up the youngest of 6 in an alcoholic dysfunctional home. There was physical and verbal abuse. I am not looking for sympathy. I know others have grown up in homes that were far worse, yet we all know that our experiences shape us, and are completely the be all and end all while we are living them (at the very least). I also know that the experience was different for each one of my siblings and I.
I learned a lot of things in that atmosphere. I learned to hide. Hide who I was, hide physically and to escape mentally. I am only now at the age of 50 discovering some of what I hid from and what I hid about my authentic self – which sadly was a lot. Growing up in that kind of home created a lot of fear for me. The subconscious is the most powerful part of your brain and will protect you from things that it doesn’t think you can handle. For example I’ve only recently – within the last week, learned that something I’ve known about in small detail all my life was actually what turned my whole life upside down when I was not quite 5 years old. How’s that for a holy crap moment?? Lol
I think this is a good place to stop for now. I have been working for the last 6-8 years to discover, redo, undo, reprogram, learn, grow and move forward in my growth, life and mind, body, spirit wellness. I keep saying and 100% mean and believe that it is all worth it! As I bring more of my story forward to you I hope you will find it so and that you will be inspired to never stop growing, learning and moving forward. I am living happily in the present , excited about my future, and letting my past go, all at once. No wonder life seems hectic sometimes. 🙂
I’ll leave you with one of my fave quotes:
“Make a pledge to yourself right now, to declare that you are worth your time and energy.”
― Deborah Day