Spirituality, Journeys, Purposes and Visions

Hello all my lovely blog readers, once again I apologize for being so long between blog postings. As I mentioned in a previous blog I’ve been undergoing a lot of personal growth and change on many levels. I think I also mentioned that this work can become all encompassing for me when it’s happening.

I did a lot of work in this similar way last year at this time and it took up a good (and I mean good in all ways here) 4-6 months of my life. I gave myself- my mind, body and spirit- the time to adjust and incorporate all of that before being ready for more work this Feb. Now I’ve been having a spiritual journey that has been creating big changes deep inside me on the subconscious level. I’ve been working with my Hypnotherapist, my Naturopath and taking some courses with a Teacher/Mentor of mine.

The work is mentally and emotionally hard, which of course affects my body. They are all connected. My stress levels (cortisol and adrenalin) are higher. Sleep, diet and exercise habits have also been impacted. Add in “normal” life, having braces put on my teeth in mid March, and the exciting planning of a trip to Scotland with my bestie- we’re going in October, oh and I can’t forget hormones! I am 50 after all; so you can imagine how it’s been!

Let’s see if I can summarize and share some of what I’ve been doing. Working with my Hypnotherapist, we’ve been working on connecting with my inner selves at the various ages and stages of my life that they represent. Bringing them all together for the greater good. So I can move forward in my growth and be who I am. Also on connecting with my soul and what represents my soul. There’s more at work here, that I’ve been doing here, but it seems to be the hardest to articulate.

Working with my Teacher/Mentor, we’ve been discovering what my purpose is in being here and what my vision is for me and the world. It’s been a totally amazing discovery. Surprising and yet not as it has tied in with the work I’m doing with my Hypnotherapist. There has been a lot of emotion brought forth from all of it. Overwhelming at times, powerful  and empowering! I’ve started the second level of my Teacher/Mentor’s Vision courses last week, and in this level we’re working on developing our mission statements. So simple sounding but so profound in the impact it has on a personal level. It’s awesome that all but one of us from the first level class have returned for the second level. It’s nice to have that connection as we’ve each gone through and continue with our personal journeys.

My Naturopath is awesome! He helps look after ALL of me- the physical, emotional/mental and spiritual. He is supportive in his suggestions, his use of/recommendations for supplements and tinctures. He uses acupuncture to help support my body and mind through all of it. My body and mind respond very well to acupuncture. When he uses the needles on those spots for stress, I am so relaxed and mellow afterwards- all spacey and you’d think I was high ;). We are working with my Hypnotherapist to make the effects last longer as I can’t always see my Naturopath as often as I’d like to. He also reminds me to be gentle with myself and to “Trust that you are on the right path! Try not to focus on the “what’s next” now that you have discovered your vision/purpose. Instead focus on staying connected and in tune with that purpose, and I think you’ll find that the “what’s next” will happen organically.”  A wise man, yes? 🙂

All of the above work has also resulted in working on some other specific things like managing expectations, ‘what are expectations?’, managing the feelings around wants and hopes, changing how I react to situations, knowing on a deeper level that that is the only thing I truly have any control over, and more.

I’ve even experienced a panic attack and a huge epiphany within a week of each other with all this work! *Whew*, it’s scary and difficult and amazing and worth it and wow…

Don’t ever think that change and growth are not worth it. Don’t ever let the fear stop you. A quote from my Naturopath that resonates with me as I’m doing all of this work:

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” ~Jack Canfield~

 

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Are You a People Pleaser?

I used to be a people pleaser, and don’t get me wrong I still love to make the people I care about happy, but I no longer do things to please people without first considering how it is or will affect me and my health.  Chronic people pleasing creates chronic stress and chronic stress creates very negative effects in our physiology! My sister, who is older than me, is a chronic people pleaser and I have and still do see the results of it in her health, both physically and mentally. Anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, obesity, lack of happiness & fulfillment and self-loathing. 

Most people don’t associate people pleasing with a higher risk of physical disease, but it is true.

People pleasing can lead to increased risk for all the major diseases including heart disease, diabetes, cancer, obesity and all manner of maladies related to chronic inflammation. It also leads to depression, anxiety and a host of psychological issues.

How does people pleasing lead you into a quagmire of chronic stress?

Here are seven examples:

1.When you are on autopilot as a people pleaser, interestingly, the people you are pleasing end up taking you for granted. Ultimately, they will take advantage of you by not reciprocating, leaving you with a feeling of chronic resentment.

2. Anxiety. People pleasing goes hand in hand with social anxiety. You please to get approval, which you rarely experience no matter how much you please. Why? Because others do not possess the power to give you the deep approval you seek, ultimately.

3. Going along with the crowd. Anytime you go along with the crowd, you give yourself up to crowd mentality, which is often unhealthy. Overeating, drinking and all kinds of unhealthy social behavior are the result.

4. Meets never met. As a people pleaser, you are very likely to neglect your own needs. Taking time for yourself, relaxing, learning and growing as an individual takes a back seat to the demands of others.

5. Lack of support. We all need support from others. People pleasers, sadly, tend to get less support because they do not ask for it or demand it, simply.

6. Loneliness. Connection is a basic human need that when neglected causes stress. People pleasers are often lonely and feel empty inside because nobody sees who they are or what they need.

7. Self-loathing. So many people pleasers hate themselves because they do not speak up or stand up for themselves. In a state of self-loathing, it is so hard to take care of yourself and your health.

Chronic people pleasing is self-sabotage

Let’s call a spade a spade. Serving others is noble. Chronic people pleasing at the expense of your own needs is self-sabotage.

The real mind blower is that people pleasers often have an unconscious program that is bent toward being controlled by others. They experience the issue passively, as if they had no power to reverse it.

People pleasers put others in charge of them by virtue of their subservient actions and go-along attitude. This is called a control attachment – a pervasive tendency to seek to be controlled by others.

You can reverse your tendency toward people pleasing by learning about the deeper tendencies involved and unraveling them. When you see the issue clearly, you can begin go make other choices that balance your needs with the needs of others.

 

Watch the free video The AHA! Process: An End to Self-Sabotage (http://programs.naturalnews.com/The_A-H-A_Solution_The_Program_that_Ends_Self-Sabotage__TV.htm and discover the lost keys to personal transformation and emotional well-being that have been suppressed by mainstream mental health for decades.

The information in this video has been called the missing link in mental health and personal development. In a world full of shallow, quick-fix techniques, second rate psychology and pharmaceutical takeovers, real solutions have become nearly impossible to find. This presentation will turn your world upside down.

 

 

Emotional eating and solutions.

If you’ve read my “about me” section you’ll see that I have had my own issues with emotional eating and it’s still a subject that is close to my heart and part of what has led me to this path of wanting to help others with nutrition and eating issues. Becoming an R.H.N is only one part of my goal. I’m currently working on adding another very beneficial skill set to my repertoire in order to help people deal with their underlying issues with eating, food and nutrition. In the meantime, here’s some great info on emotional eating and helpful ways to change the habit:

Emotional eating is the practice of consuming large quantities of food — usually “comfort” or junk foods — in response to feelings instead of hunger. Experts estimate that 75% of overeating is caused by emotions.

Many of us learn that food can bring comfort, at least in the short-term. As a result, we often turn to food to heal emotional problems. Eating becomes a habit preventing us from learning skills that can effectively resolve our emotional distress.

Depression, boredom, loneliness, chronic anger, anxiety, frustration, stress, problems with interpersonal relationships and poor self-esteem can result in overeating and unwanted weight gain.

By identifying what triggers our emotional eating, we can substitute more appropriate techniques to manage our emotional problems and take food and weight gain out of the equation.

How to Identify Eating Triggers

Situations and emotions that trigger us to eat fall into five main categories.

  • Social. Eating when around other people. For example, excessive eating can result from being encouraged by others to eat; eating to fit in; arguing; or feelings of inadequacy around other people.
  • Emotional. Eating in response to boredom, stress, fatigue, tension, depression, anger, anxiety, or loneliness as a way to “fill the void.”
  • Situational. Eating because the opportunity is there. For example, at a restaurant, seeing an advertisement for a particular food, passing by a bakery. Eating may also be associated with certain activities such as watching TV, going to the movies or a sporting event, etc.
  • Thoughts. Eating as a result of negative self-worth or making excuses for eating. For example, scolding oneself for looks or a lack of will power.
  • Physiological. Eating in response to physical cues. For example, increased hunger due to skipping meals or eating to cure headaches or other pain.

To identify what triggers excessive eating in you, keep a food diary that records what and when you eat as well as what stressors, thoughts, or emotions you identify as you eat. You should begin to identify patterns to your excessive eating fairly quickly.

How to Stop Emotional Eating

Identifying emotional eating triggers and bad eating habits is the first step; however, this alone is not sufficient to alter eating behavior. Usually, by the time you have identified a pattern, eating in response to emotions or certain situations has become a habit. Now you have to break that habit.

Developing alternatives to eating is the second step. When you start to reach for food in response to an eating trigger, try one of the following activities instead.

  • Read a good book or magazine or listen to music.
  • Go for a walk or jog.
  • Take a bubble bath.
  • Do deep breathing exercises.
  • Play cards or a board game.
  • Talk to a friend.
  • Do housework, laundry, or yard work.
  • Wash the car.
  • Write a letter.
  • Or do any other pleasurable or necessary activity until the urge to eat passes.

Other Emotional Eating Tips

Sometimes simply distracting yourself from eating and developing alternative habits is not enough to manage the emotional distress that leads to excessive eating. To more effectively cope with emotional stress, try

  • Relaxation exercises
  • Meditation
  • Individual or group counseling
  • Hypnosis/Hypnotherapy

These techniques address the underlying emotional problems which are causing you to binge and teach you to cope in more effective and healthier ways. For more information on these techniques, contact your Doctor, Naturopathic Doctor or Alternative Health Practitioner.

As you learn to incorporate more appropriate coping strategies and to curb excessive eating, remember to reward yourself for a job well done. We tend to repeat behaviors that have been reinforced, so reward yourself when you meet your nutrition management goals. Buy that blouse, take that vacation, or get that massage you wanted. By rewarding yourself for a job well done you increase the likelihood that you will maintain your new healthy habits.

Hugs!!

I admit it, I love hugs, I need hugs, I miss it when I’m not getting enough hugs! How about you? Ever heard this before?

We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.

I agree with this 100%. And here’s some more info on the importance of hugs:

While you might not notice the effects of not being touched right away, it can negatively affect your mood, your confidence  and your health. We are only beginning to understand the holistic way our bodies work and the relationship between our emotional well being and our physical health.

Here are 6 reasons why you need to be touched on a regular basis.

1. Feel connected to others. We are social beings, and although we all fall in different places on the introversion – extroversion scale, we all need to have that sense of connection to other members of our tribe. While some of that connection can come from having conversations with others, touch also plays an important role in human communication.

2. Reduce anxiety. Simply touching another person can make us feel more secure and less anxious. It can make us feel grounded and safe and not so all alone. It’s not just children who could use a warm, reassuring hug to make things a little better, so if you’re feeling like a bundle of nerves, go ahead and ask for a hug.

3. Bonding. Touch is one of the ways romantic partners bond with each other and parents bond with their children. When partners and families get busy and let touch go out the window, they’ll often find that they don’t feel as close and relationships suffer. Regular touch is one of the ways that we continually renew our bonds with those we love.

4. Lowers your blood pressure. Studies have shown that those that get regular touch often have lower blood pressure than those that don’t. Even having a pet can have beneficial effects! Touch can also slow the heart rate and help speed recovery times from illness and surgery.

5. Improve your outlook. It’s harder to get into a pessimistic funk when you feel the confidence of being connected to others. Touch can make people feel more optimistic and positive and less cynical and suspicious. A positive, trusting attitude towards others can reduce tension in our daily lives and improve our relationships.

6. Give us the sensory input that we crave. Scientists are just discovering how truly important it is to exercise all our physical senses for proper brain and emotional development. All the various kinds of touch from butterfly kisses to deep tissue massage send our brains the physical inputs it needs to make sense of the world. So, along with touching other people and pets, make time to explore different textures and touch sensations such as letting cool sand run through your fingers or taking a warm relaxing bath.

Don’t let yourself get too busy that you starve yourself of touch. It’s important for your physical, mental and emotional well being to touch others and let others touch you.

About me

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Valerie came to Holistic Nutrition and Hypnosis through her own journey to health and wellness. Along with a strong desire to help others she has a passion for lifelong learning. Seven years of experience working in the Natural and Alternative Health fields gained her experience in Reiki, Quantum Touch Energy Healing, Reflexology, supplementation and organics. Her journey also brought her to BC where she attended the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition and earned her Registered Holistic Nutritionist designation. She uses this training to help clients achieve wellness in mind, body and spirit.

Knowing the importance of the connection between physical and mental/spiritual well-being Valerie also added the designation of Board Certified Hypnotist to her skill set to further her education. Personal experience has shown her the transformative power of hypnosis in making permanent changes and she believes in using complementary modalities in order to do the best for her clients and others.

Valerie brings her intuition, caring nature and ability to make strong connections to every aspect of her life. She also brings first-rate organizational skills and experience in information gathering to her work.

Her passion for learning has helped Valerie become an accomplished researcher and protocol developer and she continues to expand her portfolio of nutrition and lifestyle protocols for many common health conditions. Her work is used by Naturopathic Doctors as easy aids for their patients when confronted with new health issues or when learning to manage existing health issues for a better long term outcome.

Certification in Teaching and Training Adults has also made her an enthusiastic and proficient workshop presenter and allows her to bring her passion for sharing knowledge to a broader audience.

Valerie also writes her own regular blog [https://nourishment3.com/category/blog/] where she shares knowledge, personal experience, inspiration and humour in her drive and commitment to health and wellness for all.